I have always been a make up fanatic/junkie. Playing with my own make up and watching countless videos on You Tube it has always been a source of fascination that I can mess around with and be happy whether I end up looking like a model or in most cases end up looking like a mess. The path to getting there will always be worth it.
Christmas 2012 was my make up dream, my partner spoilt me very much and reminded me how lucky I am to have him in my life. I have not been able to stop using my presents since then. I am starting to do make up trials for my mother’s wedding on myself. I will be doing my mother’s make up on the day and so the make up trials on her will be starting very soon now.
In the meantime, I am experimenting on myself. I know that I will be using the Karl Lagerfeld Mon Shu Red lipstick and also using the red nail varnish again from the same Shu Uemura range designed by Lagerfeld. My mother bought them for me for Christmas alongside the bag with Mon Shu on it that she got for free for buying two products from the range. ***I love that bag by the way, I have been using it for the past couple of weeks now even for work!***
Through this experimenting though I got to think about masks in general. I do not have to hide my atheism that much in comparison to other people. There are some countries where you would go to prison and worse if found out. But I begin to wonder if I still do hide my atheism to a certain extent. My partner loves me but prefers if I keep my non-belief to myself. Whether its a notion of “well as long as he knows about my non belief” or the question of is he hampering my own freedom of expression? Both are debatable.
I do wonder what response you the reader would provide in relation to the aforementioned…..are you happy to keep your atheism in the background when your partner knows about it but prefers it kept in the background or is that not good enough and you would want to express your atheism more fully and without it being hampered?
I know that I am happy with my atheism being in the background and him knowing about it. I feel comfortable and I know I have other outlets for my atheistic ideas such as this blog here. Is that good enough though…..should any relationship where non belief is in the background allow atheism to move forward from this background to be more integrated within it? I am happy with the agreed status quo within my relationship but would you be?
I would even extend this to other relationships I have….my mother knows that I am an atheist. Whenever she talks to me about it I give her my argument against the belief in god/religion. In the end I get a response worse than “god works in mysterious ways” crap. Instead I get the whole I am a lost cause and that I could never be persuaded otherwise to believe about a magical invisible man in the sky!
At work, on paper they know I am an atheist, when I filled out my job application they have that questionnaire at the end (most places of employment do these days) to make sure they are abiding alongside the whole “equal opportunities” stuff. It will state in my file that I am atheist but without looking at my file they would be none the wiser so I wonder, based on natural assumptions, would a colleague look at you and think either a) you are a believer or b) you are an atheist? I appreciate this question would have different answers based on your own geographical location and the various cultures within those locations. But based on where you live in the world would it be answer A or answer B?
Do you choose to freely hide your atheism in the background or the opposite….are you forced to hide your non belief for fear of any violent response whether physical or mental? If your answer is no to both then do you express your atheism in all areas of your life or just some?
I leave my atheism in the background in my relationship with my partner but then again, I choose to be very expressive with it with my friendships, my blog, Facebook statuses and if given the opportunity at work. I say “given the opportunity” because the question of belief in religion or god does not materialise in my line of work. It does not matter. But if it did, then I suppose it depends. If I knew I would not be put at a disadvantage by being discriminated against then I would be freely expressive, but if I knew it would hamper my career….I do not know. I would like to say that would not matter but then again, if put in that position, I think I would be a weakling and be forced stay quiet as a result. Would that make me a bad person to not be so steadfast alongside my principles if that was what I did in that situation?
This is hypothetical but I know that whether a response if from a real situation that has come about or you manufacture a response you think would result from a hypothetical situation, it allows me to learn more about myself and how I would handle myself in those situations either real or not. Hence all the questions in this blog based on real and not real circumstances. And if you have got this far in reading this blog entry, then firstly well done and secondly, if you have the time I would really appreciate your input in the comments section below. I do read them all and its brilliant to learn from other perspectives.